Happy Birthday

Your Nana was sure you would be born in the pool or at least come out swimming. It had been a long hot summer and I felt like I made a whale look slim and fit. And I was positive that an elephant could pirouette me under the table. I didn’t carry those last months with grace…

I was sure you would be born early, but as I would learn every first mother thinks that. I was also positive that you would be the smartest, prettiest and most creative child on the face of the earth. Once again, I wasn’t the first new mother to think that although you certainly showed an incredible amount of acumen early on and you were (and still are!) a gorgeous girl. Well, and creativity doesn’t always display itself in paintings. Sometimes it’s revealed in the various ways one child could find trouble (lest you ever forget the Curious case of the Naked Child in a Suitcase Incident!).

Twenty-two years ago, I was naive enough to think that I had what it took to be a good mother. If I’d been a little older and a little more experienced, perhaps I would have understood that I did not yet have all that I needed…

Nevertheless, on August 18. when my water broke and I had no doubt that you were going to be in my arms soon, I was thrilled. I was also terrified of the tearing and breaking that was sure to come when an 8 lb. infant descends through a body part that is– well, generally too small for a head that is 9″ in circumference to get through! But I survived your entrance and you survived me, I guess.

What I hoped when you were born– well, perhaps one of the greatest mistakes a parent can make is to cast all their hopes and dreams onto their child. So what I hoped for when you were born that morning (at 3:30 a.m.! Now that was a long day!!!) is perhaps of little consequence. Perhaps what you should know now is what I hope for you now…

I hope that you are happy. I hope that you find joy in sunsets and contentment in a quiet moment with yourself. I hope that you are your BEST self. That you love well and are well loved in return. That you give knowing that giving is a gift to yourself, recalling you to the greater humanity to which we are all a part. I hope that you are awed by the vastness of the universe and curious about the intricacies of a honeybee hive or a spider’s web. I hope that you find things that so enthrall you that the day slips away and you go to your night’s sleep still entranced by the day’s adventures,  and that you slip past the entrapments that can bog you down and chain you to earth. I hope that you have magic in life and…

I hope that you are happy.

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